On the social media site of my choosing, my news feed has recently been filled with people offering insight and advice. There seem to be endless articles sharing how one is meant to love another, how a man is meant to be a gentleman, how a lady is meant to be a woman and how a eunuch is meant to get through customs.
People freely write about their most intimate of encounters and feelings, spilling their proverbial upon the sheets, written or otherwise, not necessarily in the interests of enlightening others, but purely in the interest, it seems of broadcasting a confessional. These voices are so absolute, so sure in their tone of solemn disclosure and excruciating detail that my journey of personal insight seems dim and faded in comparison.
Perhaps I lack confidence. According to one of the articles I read, I do, but according to that same article, it’s okay that I lack confidence. It informed me that everyone lacks confidence and those who appear otherwise are the least confident of all, this meaning that I am, in actual fact, incredibly confident by not appearing or, indeed feeling so.
Another article told of how to be a true gentleman, I had to ignore a potential love interest completely whilst giving them everything they need. I had to feel like a man while laughing like a woman; make love with force whilst being attentive to the gentleness of their needs; dance like a whirlwind whilst pogoing with a hamster… I forget the details.
As a forty year old single parent who has had, if not Motley Crue levels of interactions with the opposite sex then at the very least, John Denver levels I wondered if I had anything to offer to the world which might enrich or assist another’s travels. Could I put into words some of the experiences I have had, coin them in some way which might be deserving of a meme, thus proving their worth? After wracking my brain, rummaging through my soul and tipping over a vase, this was what I came up with…
Don’t be a dick.
Take from that what you will. Then stop reading articles about how or who you should be. Go out and live and see where you end up. Burn all words from your mind, including these ones and go make your own.